How To Buy A Bus Ticket Online in South Korea

With so many people living here, it’s no wonder that it’s so easy to grab any kind of public transportation you want in Korea. Whether it be plane, train, cab, bus, subway, there’s always a way to get where you need to go. The transportation I take most often, however, would definitely have to be the bus. I take the city bus to school everyday, but it’s the inter-city buses that stole my heart away within the first few weeks of being in Korea. Of course you can just stroll up to the terminal at any time and ask for the next bus that will take you to your desired destination, but I quickly learned with my first few visits to Seoul that sometimes just hoping and praying isn’t necessarily going to help you get the ticket you want when you want it. If you’d like reserve a bus ticket definitely the best way to do so is through https://www.hticket.co.kr/main.action.

*NOTE: It will greatly help if you or someone you know is able to just read a little Korean so you can read your city name.*

*NOTE 2: You will need EITHER a Korean Alien Registration Number or Korean bank account number for the transaction to go through.*

1. If you have a Korean keyboard you can type in ‘이지티켓‘ in Google or Naver. There may be two top options, but please click on the one about ‘hticket’.

2. Once you click on the website it will take you to this page:

3. On the left hand side 출발지 (Departure place) is the first option. This is where knowing your city in Korean will be crucial, but after the first time you find your city you can just go by the number to the right hand side and it will be easier to find.

Since I live in Chungju I will choose the [460] option.

4. Now for your second option, 도착지 (Arrival). When coming from Chungju I can only choose options for Seoul, so I’m going to choose the Gangnam (Central City) [020] Terminal because I go there most often.

5. Now you’re going to choose your departure date. I’m going to choose Friday’s date because nearly everyone is trying to go to Seoul on a Friday (but seriously). So, next to 출발일시 (Departure date and time) choose your date!

6. As you’ve probably guessed, 출발시간 is the time you want to leave. Be careful here that you choose morning or afternoon appropriately. I’ve had that mishap before…:P

7. Don’t worry about the last box. but click on 조회 to continue!

8. The next page is like the Terms and Agreement page so to continue click on the bottom left hand option that says 확인.

9. Now you can choose your bus time and what kind of bus you’d like. The more expensive buses, the one that says 10,900 won, are typically Express Buses and are more expensive because they’re more spacious and allow you to get your own seat if you choose to. However, if you’re in for a shorter journey and don’t mind sharing the space, the cheaper buses are just as comfortable and, well, cheaper! Pay close attention to the times of each buses as well as the prices on the far left hand side, and then, once you’ve chosen your bus, click on the blue button on the far right that says 선택 (Choose).

Scroll down to the bottom and click on the green button on the right that says 이천 to go to the next page.

10. Before you can choose your bus seat, choose how many adults will be riding at the top next to where it says 어른. Then you can slick on any seat number that does not have a red [x] already in it.

Scroll down to the bottom and click the green button that says 예약하기.

11. You’re almost there! Here on the last page there’s going to be a lot of information but don’t let it deter you! At the very top of the page it’s going to have all of your ticket choice including your departure and arrival cities, time of your departure, seat number, the whole shebang. This is your last chance to check everything out to make sure it’s correct.

Now scroll down and, in the second gray box that starts with 이용약관, click on the only open box to make a check mark.

12. Last step! Now it’s time for you to put in your card information. Next to where it says 카드구… you won’t have to click on anything as long as the first option is already clicked. The next box down, however, is where you’ll put your card number. It shouldn’t matter whether this is a  The next two boxes are the expiration date, and the bottom is the last six digits of your Alien Registration Card number. These digits are your birthday starting with the last two digits of your birth year, followed by your birth month and the day.

Once you’ve put all that in, click on the green button at the bottom for the all clear! The next page it should take you too should have two choices for you to put in either your card number or Alien Registration number to confirm your reservation. You are also able to cancel your reservation by clicking on the 최소 button next to the reservation, though it will be a small fee to do so.

And that’s all there is to it. Happy reserving!:)

Dating in South Korea

I’ve actually gotten lots questions from friends and family back home about whether or not I am, and this is a direct quote, “a prematurely made cat lady who is obviously lonely out of her mind” because I’m a foreigner living in another country. The question had so many wrong parts to it it was hard to know where to begin, but I’ll go ahead and start with the fact that I am actually allergic to cat hair and therefore don’t think I’ll be a cat lady until they discover a permanent vaccine for said allergy. Also, of course you’re able to date in Korea. Dating in Korea is a big deal. Like, of everywhere else I’ve ever been it seems that being alone here is one of the number one problems you could ever have. Everyone wants you to be in a relationship. It’s addressed in every movie, sitcom, and drama you’ll ever see here. One of the first questions anyone will ask you when they first meet you, often right after your name and where are you from, is “Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?”. This question is off limits to absolutely no one. Our bosses asked all of the foreign teachers on our first day about our relationship statuses and were wholeheartedly flummoxed and disappointed that all 4 of us were single. It’s like being single here is as novel a concept as Americans not having Starbucks. (For the record, my friend from South Africa insists there is no Starbucks there and all of us were horrified at the mere idea that there was a place in the Free World that did not have the option between a tall or venti latte. But I digress.) So yes, dating is a big deal. Fortunately, I have had the opportunity to date both Koreans and fellow foreigners since I’ve been here and they were incredibly different experiences, but certainly no better or worse than one or the other. First off, everyone wonders whether Koreans are into dating foreigners and I can absolutely, with conviction, assure you that they are just as into foreigners as they are into other Koreans. And it doesn’t matter what color you are, or what country you’re from, or even whether or not you speak Korean. It’s mostly the younger generation that has no problem dating outside of the “traditional” dating scene, but I’ve seen plenty of middle age Korean men out with younger foreign women as well. My experiences, along with other friends of mine who have dated a native, have been varied when it comes to dating Korean men, but one thing we can all agree on is how attentive Korean men, and Korean women from as far as I’ve been to tell, can be when in a relationship. What you have to understand is that traditional Korean couples often spend anytime they’re not actually together texting, talking on the phone, and then actually hanging out as often as possible. When dating a foreigner, most Koreans expect that you want the same treatment, or else they just like to give you lots of attention. Texting non-stop is definitely to be expected whether you’re dating a male or female. Whether it’s checking to make sure you are still alive, or even simply that you’ve eaten (the latter is far more common than the former, but not by much), expect at least a few messages in your inbox while you’re with your significant other. They are often very concerned about your well being. I can’t tell you how many texts I’ve gotten warning me to be careful I don’t get a cold, that I’m eating properly, to go get medicine if whether I think my runny nose is just allergies or not. I had a friend whose fairly new Korean boyfriend looked up and then sent her the name of every hospital within a 20 miles radius of where she lived, and then sent her directions to each one because he lived in Seoul and couldn’t take her there himself. It was sweet that he cared, but definitely caused me to raise a curious eyebrow. I can’t think of many men who would just up and do that back home, not because they didn’t care, but because they could just as easily bring me soup and make sure I made a doctor’s appointment for the next day. Honestly his checking on her was great, I was just surprised at how much he seemed to care when they’d only been dating a few weeks. Dates themselves are pretty much like every other date I’ve been on regardless of where I am in the world. I’ve gone to normal lunches or dinners, walking through the park, ice skating, lots of normal things that I’d do anywhere else. The only difference, I think, is when I’ve gone on more than one place on a Korean date we switch off paying for one thing or another. So he’ll pay for lunch, but after if we get coffee or dessert I’ll pay, which I totally don’t mind and even prefer. So, yes, in my experience Korean men like to take care of you, like being around you and enjoy your time together a little more than I’m used to, but there’s nothing wrong with that. Many girls thoroughly enjoy being loved on in such a way and have perfectly normal relationships as far as I’ve seen. Being so actively into dating isn’t necessarily my cup of tea because I’m very used to being independent. Still, my relationships here can be a nice change from the norm of what I’m used to. If you’re coming here and, like I was, are certain you are going to remain totally alone for the better part of your stay because of your being a foreigner, I’d say don’t sweat it. There’s someone out there for everyone, and I wholeheartedly suggest you get out there and experience any new adventures you decide on for yourself!

When “place where I live and work” suddenly became “Home”

The first time the words casually came out of my mouth I was shocked.

During a week long vacation in September I went to Tokyo to just kind of get away for a little while, but also to start on my “I want to see it all!” fantasy. The trip was great, but on my last night as I sat in the living room of the hostel with about a dozen others I sighed and mock lamented, “Man, it’s going to be so weird speaking Korean again when I get home.”

A few people nodded in understanding, one of my new friends giggled a little, but no one acknowledged what I had said because they obviously didn’t understand the implications. I remember tensing up a little because for the first time I realized that home was not where it had always been for the past 20+ years of my life. I will admit it was slightly terrifying to think that when I said ‘home’ I didn’t mean a suburb in Texas, my extended families’ homes on the East coast, or in any of the United States in general. Subconsciously I had been calling my little studio apartment in the middle of Chungju ‘home’ for months, but saying it out loud was an affirmation that I had abandoned any pretense that it was anything more than a place I simply lived.

My home in Korea is the first one I have made for myself with only the slightest of guiding hands. I’m the one who decided that decorating my apartment meant just taping pictures on the walls, that found out which restaurants are healthier and, therefore, to be avoided at all costs. No one else in my family back home knows the places I like to eat at that are simply closer to where I live, the cooks who know my name and face because I’ve been so often, or what I like to do on the weekends when I’m not doing my best to imitate a hibernating bear. I know all of the intricacies involved with taking a bus, a train, the subway, even flying. I have favorite foods now that I’m not sure whether or not I’m going to have withdrawals from when I finally leave. I have hobbies that are entirely my own (for a brief moment I took up cooking…?), I’ve conquered fears, learned a new language (sort of), met new people and taken myself on journeys I never thought were possible.

It’s a combination of all the little things that have helped me to make this place home, but the moment I bought my plane ticket back to Texas to visit my family was the first time I realized how attached I really was. I was actually on the verge of a mini anxiety attack as I searched for flights. After a long minute I finally discovered why I was being so weird. So small but so glaringly obvious, I nearly slapped myself when I realized the problem was that, while I had been searching, I hadn’t clicked ‘Roudtrip’.

Immediately after I subconsciously recognized that I was, in fact, coming back to Korea I relaxed. My shoulders completely relaxed, my heart stopped pounding, and I laughed a bit at my overreaction. But it wasn’t an overreaction at all because for a second I truly thought that I was losing what I’ve taken so long to build: my new home.

This past month, nearly exactly a year to the day, I finally visited my friends and family back in the good old US of A. Of course I was excited, happy to finally be somewhere where I understood everyone and I knew exactly where to get all the products I’ve been without while all the way across the ocean. But in the back of my mind, late at night so I couldn’t examine it too closely, I found myself wondering what was going on “back home”. I couldn’t exactly remember if I had turned off the heater and nearly groaned at the bajillion won bill I was going to find if I hadn’t. I wondered what my friends and Korean families were up to, if the kids I saw once a week were studying hard, if the very nice barista at the Starbucks down the street from my apartment was going to think I had moved away or died since I see her at least once a week and hadn’t been in nearly 2.

I’m not going to be so dramatic as to say I was itching to get back or that I would rather be in Korea than my original home. I absolutely treasured every moment I had in America like it was my last, but I also acknowledged that it was no longer the only home I had. It’s not crazy that I finally think of this place as more than a foreign country or just my place of employment. It has been over a year after all! It is however, strangely comforting, to find that I finally find myself equally comfortable in both places, something that I didn’t think was ever going to be possible no matter how much I loved living here.

In short, anywhere I feel comfortable enough to dance around the room in my underwear while doing laundry is home to me and honestly probably always will be.

Being Black in South Korea

Happy new year everyone! Hopefully you all rang in 2015 the best way you knew how all around the world just as we did. Of course, it wouldn’t be the start of a new year without something slightly out of my comfort zone, so this year I’m allowing it to come in the form of a blog post. I’ve actually waited this long to post about this topic because I wanted to have lived here for a significant amount of time before trying to speak on the subject.

Oh snap, here we go. Before we get started, I want to go ahead and preface that these experiences are my own with a few of my other friend’s of color’s stories mixed in. This is a delicate subject for most (everyone) people and I already anticipate differing opinions, but I feel like it’s important for me to actually speak on what I have seen and done in reference to my race while here in Korea.

When I first decided to come to Korea, I admit I was absolutely terrified about how I was going to be received because of my skin color. It’s not a secret that Korea, like many other countries in the world, celebrate paler skin and more Caucasian features. That’s not to say that they are deliberately racist or anything of the sort, but Korea specifically is more exposed to Hollywood and other Western stereotypes that perpetuate that white is beautiful. Of course there are two sides to every coin and whatnot, but the general consensus from what I have seen is that pale skin is more popular. There have also been many different cases of racism and stereotyping when it comes to people of color by Korean celebrities and regular people alike. Whether this is simply from ignorance or the fact that people here genuinely see black people in a certain light, these questionable moments have happened, and knowing they have happened made me extremely wary before I even stepped off the plane.

When I first arrived I was in the protective embrace of orientation where everyone was from somewhere else and we were all fish out of water foreigners, so really at no point did my race come up as anything other than “What country are you from?”. It wasn’t until we went on our first field trip to Jeonju, a beautiful city not far from Daejeon where orientation was held, that I felt it. Now, I understand the situation wasn’t a normal one. There were basically a million foreigners storming the streets of this village like town while the natives were also out in full force, staring us down. Of course, now my reaction seems a little silly, but at the time I almost had  a genuine panic attack in the midst of such a crowd goggling us like we were a TV show. I’m getting anxiety just from thinking about it now.

My reaction to people looking at me didn’t stop in Jeonju. When we got to Chungju, where I currently live, every time we went into E-Mart and I accidentally got in someone’s way or made eye contact, even just felt someone’s presence around me, my reaction was instantaneous. I would mumble out an apology and physically shrink into myself like I was about to be hit. Now, back home, this reaction would have been beyond strange for me. I’m not necessarily known for being shy in any way shape or form, so for my reaction to be so strong and instinctual was something that required some soul searching. After months of this ongoing strange behavior, along with everyone’s the comments when they realized what I was doing, I found the cause. It was because I continued to wait for someone to have a negative reaction to my presence, and I was literally mentally and physically repelling it before I had a chance to examine anyone’s reaction at all.

As time went on I finally stopped being so afraid. It’s not because I no longer notice, because I do, or that I no longer care, because that would also be a lie, but because now I’m actually curious. Sometimes I will stare at people and they will stare me back down, but at least now I know, for the most part, that they’re just trying to figure me out.

Rather than looking for blatantly negative moments, it’s the subtle ones that happen every once in awhile that really bother me. Like when the students that come in for the week automatically think I’m from Africa or Jamaica. Or when they only have Obama or hip hop videos as reference to what they think my life is like in America. Something inside of me dies literally anytime anyone says, “Yo yo, what’s up man?!” to me simply because they think that’s how I talk on a regular basis, as if I would ever speak like that in a classroom setting or even on the regular for that matter.

Most of the time my race doesn’t come up at all. My co-teachers in particular don’t ever comment on my skin color, merely the fact that I’m a foreigner. Unfortunately, I know this cannot be said for all of my friends here in Korea. Especially when the Ebola virus broke out, even Korea, thousands of miles from anywhere that had anyone who was infected, started panicking and looking suspiciously at all black people. I was on the subway with a friend of mine who is also of color and has natural hair and an older man laughed, pointed and loudly exclaimed as he was walking by, “Africa, ebola!”

Needless to say, neither of us found this even slightly amusing.

Another time a friend of mine came to visit from America and as we walked through the subway this drunk ahjussi screamed, in albeit slurred, but detectable, English, “GO BACK TO YOUR FUCKING COUNTRY!” Now, there was also a foreign couple right in front of us who turned to see who he was talking to, and there’s no way to know if it was about us being foreign or both my friend and I being black, but it was shocking nonetheless. That has been the only event that has truly stuck out in my mind as obviously negative. There are of course the horror stories you’ll hear about taxi drivers not wanting to take someone somewhere because of their color, or someone making a blatantly rude comment, but for the most part I haven’t had more than those few small incidents happen to me.

For the most part, despite my physical appearance, I often feel just as comfortable as I do at home. Racism exists everywhere, in small doses or large depending on where you live, but for the most part here it often seems to be less about my race and more the fact that I’m a foreigner. Of course people see that I’m black, but I’ve gotten less commentary on it here than I do at home. In Texas I’m constantly aware of the fact that I’m a different color. In Korea I’m more constantly aware that I’m simply a waygook and people are more likely to look at me strange because I can’t figure out my damn recycling than anything.

What I’m really trying to wrap up with here, in a long-winded sort of way, is that my initial fears of being something of a social outcast in Asia because I’m African-American were completely unfounded. Of course, this is just my take of things because I know others have had different experiences. However, though I’m certainly I’m happy when I see others who look like me, but it’s not a huge deal when I don’t. I no longer try to count the amount of other black people I see when I’m walking down the street in Seoul, nor do I no longer scramble for some kind of unseen social foothold. I feel as accepted as if I simply moved somewhere else in the States. If your only reasoning for not wanting to move abroad is your race, as I know several others who actually struggle with this, I say don’t worry about it. Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.

Or something like that.

What My Students Taught Me

There are days that I love my job. I mean, like, wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world, I’m staying forever and growing old, love my job. There are also, like everyone else in the world, days where I want to simply curl up in a ball under my desk and not move for the rest of the day. Of course there are plenty of factors that go into making a day great or terrible: whether I could get my hair to do what I wanted that morning, the weather, being sick, being HUNGRY, etc. But no matter what my mood when I wake up in the morning, it can be instantly changed depending on just one thing: my students.

Now, being at an English Center means that I’ve taught, from the beginning of this year, hundreds of students from all over my Province, plenty of them just from my city. We never know what they’re going to be like when they arrive. Some weeks can be super challenging if the students are like dead weight, meaning that for whatever reason they’re not vocal in class or have a hard time participating. Other weeks are challenging for completely different reasons. Students being out of control or behaviorally challenging can make a week feel like a year. Then there are the weeks that are absolutely stellar, perfect to the point of true terror because I’m waiting on something to go wrong. These are weeks where the students are actively participating in class, aren’t necessarily any kind of fluent but ask questions and genuinely want to learn while also managing to behave. They are any teacher’s dream, and while I don’t expect every week to be that way, they certainly put things in perspective.Of course my Gifted Class, the one class I do have complete control over and see regularly, are my babies. Their behavior I can see fluctuate, race and calm as if we were in a normal class setting.

All of our students that we see are completely different in learning style, in personality, in learning goals even if they don’t know they have them. After every week I realize I’ve learned something new, whether I meant to or not. Sometimes I prefer the challenging weeks because those students often teach me almost as much as I taught them. Hundreds of students later I am absolutely no expert, but I have picked up on the following:

 

1. Never get comfortable

For me it’s very easy to get into a routine when teaching, and even EPIK highly suggests using a certain formula in the classroom. Though it works a lot of the time, using the same formular over and over makes it worse when you have to veer off the beaten path. My students absolutely don’t know or care that I am on any kind of schedule when teaching. They don’t care that I’ve only allotted 5 minutes for warm-up because if they like the activity we’re going they’re going to do their best to drag it out and now we’re 15 minutes in and I’m running 10 minutes behind. I may never win the Nobel Prize of Teaching, but if nothing else the flexibility I have developed with 5th graders should become legend. At the beginning of the year I would scramble and freak out a little if I was even 5 minutes behind, let alone 10. Now, I’ve got 9 backup activities and alternate lesson plan in my back pocket so that even if we got interrupted halfway through by SWAT my students would be able to teach them what we we’ve been learning. Ain’t nobody messing with my class.

 

2. Absolutely no one learns the exact same way

Just as you’ll have to adjust for yourself, you need to adjust for students needs too. I had one boy who could not understand a word I was saying (a common theme with younger students especially) and it was very difficult for him as all of our classes are in English. I discovered about 10 minutes into class that he was scribbling on a piece of paper. In response, I started trying to draw different countries to have students guess what they were and what continents they were on. I am absolutely no Picasso and by the end of class even my co-teacher was dying laughing at my drawing of Europe…but the point was that I had every student’s attention, and everyone understood what was happening. Including my little scribbler in the corner who had all but given up on the day.

 

3. Lack of response means a million different things

It’s so easy to want to get on a kid who’s not participating in class. Whether they’re just not looking at you or are actively trying to do something else, I find my eye immediately going to this one particular student throughout class, and if it’s more than one I find myself getting discouraged by their lack of response. It’s very easy for me to begin immediately internalizing that I’m not doing a good job when that’s not the case. So I’ve recently had to learn to rein in any and all of my emotions and simply readjust. Sometimes I go from one very rambunctious class where I need to be firmer in my control and, consequently, my lecture. Then I go to the next one that is silent as the grave for various reasons. The students in what I have nicknamed The Graveyard Shift could just be tired, having a bad day, or don’t understand what the heck is going on. Either way, before anything else I used to often find myself wondering what I did wrong. Now, instead of dwelling, I press on. A lot of times I sense that they’re simply afraid so I start off super calm, speak incredibly slowly, and then gradually warm them up. Then I push more energy into the room, praise even the smallest feedback, dance around to prove a point, get overwhelmingly excited at responses so they’re encouraged to get teacher to continue acting silly.  Of course, these things are hit and miss and acting like half an idiot to get your students out of their shell might not be your thing. Still, I can’t tell you how much of a difference warming them up to the idea that they can can make. If nothing else, just remember that it’s not necessarily about you. Try your best, but don’t be bummed when your lesson on Thanksgiving isn’t as hard hitting as you’d hoped it would be. They’re trying even if it doesn’t look like it.

 

4. You’re not perfect, and you don’t have to be.

On bad days it’s easy for me to think, ‘Did I even teach them anything? What are they taking away from this?‘. I know several teachers who tell me they’ve thought the same thing, that sometimes even when they were trying their absolute best it didn’t feel like they’d done anything at all. After a particularly grueling class the week before, I sat my Gifted Students down and asked them to write in their journal what they felt was the most important thing they had learned in class that year. The answers were shocking. They wrote about lessons that had happened months before, about words they’d learned, countries they hadn’t known existed before, told me all about how their confidence with English had improved because I never told them they were wrong just tried to correct their mistakes. I’m not even ashamed to say I got a little teary eyed. Just because they don’t say it out loud doesn’t mean they don’t hear you and think what you have to say is important.

 

My students have also taught me less hard hitting things, like how to play Rock-Scissors-Paper in groups larger than 2, Korean slang, the best way to eat ddeokbokki, small things that I still try not to take for granted. After the first few months I no longer try to pretend that I am just their teacher as I’m learning everyday just as much as they are. Still, I pray they never have an Anakin Skywalker moment and try to use the Force I’ve taught them against me…

 

14 things everyone teaching in Korea can relate to

Sure I do a lot of teaching here in Korea, but there are also lots of things that teaching in Korea has taught me. I can definitely thank my students for half of my new teachings because there is just nothing like teaching in a Korean classroom.

 

1. You start talking to everyone, no matter if they’re fluent speakers, friends and family, at a much slower pace. 

It’s not that you think they’re stupid, but you’re used to trying not to speak as fast to give your students time to catch up and it’s a hard habit to break.

 

2. You’ve got stories for DAYS about the crazy -ish your students say to you inside and outside the classroom.

 

3. After months of having Kimchi for lunch (which you have, at some point, gained an affinity for), you will miss food from home something FIERCE…

 

4. Literally ANY problem in the classroom can be solved with Gawi Bawi Bo (scissors, rock, and paper). Anything.

It is NOT just a game, it is a way of LIFE!

 

5. Korean Surprise is as real as outer space and twice as hard to understand.

Oh you mean I’m supposed to be teaching another class right now? That I’ve never done before? Our director’s on his way to observe the class as well? I’ve got 15 minutes? Splendid!

 

6. The only time you’re going to escape a work related outing when it is brought up is never. 

The chances of you going home sober are also slim, no matter whether it’s a Tuesday night or not. Accept it.

 

7. You know the words (and dances) to songs you will probably never actually understand, whether intentionally or not.

But you’ve got to admit, some of them are definitely catchy!

 

8. Keeping up with who is or isn’t popular in a boy or girl group is next to impossible. Accept that they will probably all appear the same to you and you will just have to take your kids’ word for it that they’re good.

I have learned to never question the power of EXO no matter what, I just press play.

 

9. The more Korean words you learn the more you’ll try them in the classroom, only to have your students laugh outright at your adorable Korean baby babble.

Either that or they’ll try to add to your slim vocabulary collection with something more complicated than you are willing to handle.

 

10. You’ve developed the most unique sign language anyone’s ever come up with, but as long as your students understand that you meant ‘Why is that bad??’, you will flap your arms like a bird for the rest of the school year if you have to!

 

11. God bless that one student who always responds to your questions and/or translates to the rest of the class.

 

12. God save you when they’re absent.

 

13. There are days when your kiddos will drive you absolutely insane…

 

14….but you love them for better or worse because, seriously, what else would you be doing?

Living in Korea: Honesty is the best policy!

It’s no secret that image is very important in Korean culture and I’ve mentioned briefly in the past how my Korean co-teachers, and, well, all Koreans in general, have absolutely no problem telling you exactly what they think of you when it comes to your appearance. Whether it’s a first meeting or you have known each other for awhile, I have learned more about myself in the past 6 months than I knew in my entire life back home because no one here has any qualms letting me know anything about myself whether I want to know or not. In a way it can be very refreshing having someone say everything they think about you to your face , including your personality. It can also be a little discombobulating when someone tells you, with absolutely no remorse, that you look “much prettier with makeup on”.

You have to understand that if someone here in Korea makes a comment about you to you it is hardly ever, in my experience, said with spite. Unless, as I learned on the subway the morning after a particularly rough night in Hongdae, it is to inform you that you look as though you ‘have no class’ and next time should probably ‘wear heels’. To that ahjumma that was offended by my clear lack of image control at 8 in the morning after getting home at 5, I apologize. I also never knew there could be so many things a person could be to make them attractive or unattractive. For example, I found out that I have not just a small face, but big eyes, a normal but high bridged nose (which, I am told, is a pretty foreigner thing), small ears and a “glamorous” (which basically means big boobed) body. These are apparently my “attractive” qualities. But make no mistake, I am far from perfect as anyone who works with me will be able to tell you by the end of every work day.

I have literally a million stories just  from being at work where I was flabbergasted at the lack of sugarcoating that goes on. One day I was definitely not feeling life, but was smiling and felt as though no one really knew what a struggle it had been to get out of bed that morning while also staying awake. At least, no one said anything. My fellow English speaking teachers remained oblivious and, other than a couple of extra glances through the day, my Korean co-teachers seemed that way as well. I should have known better than to think I was off the hook. The next day, after I was feeling much better, my co-teacher says to me, “Wow, you look much better today!” Jokingly I responded, “Oh? Did I look bad yesterday?”

Pause.

Now, if I had said something like this at home to a friend, or really anyone who’d made the comment, their response would have been something along the lines of, “No, you didn’t look bad, you just look really nice today!” I don’t know why, after 6 months of living here, I thought the response would be anything like that at all. It’s like I haven’t lived in this country at all! What I should have expected, and what came out of my co-teacher’s mouth, with a frown, was, “Yeah, yesterday you looked really tired and your skin condition was not that great. But today, much better!” Then, with a smile and a flounce, she patted me on the shoulder and waltzed right into the classroom.

These situations are absolutely not uncommon, and they are absolutely not intended to be negative or degrading in any way. Especially now that they know us so well and we see each other everyday, our fellow teachers are normally full of compliments, happy to say how nice someone’s hair looks that day, how small their waist, how cute a guy’s new haircut or how nice someone’s outfit looks on them. When comments are made about someone’s acne or how and their condition looks, it is often said out of legitimate concern and observation rather than a pointed display of flaws. My ultimate favorite story of ‘Well ok then…’ came from my students, of whom I should definitely have expected great verbal material but was, as usual, caught off-guard at their candidness.

That day I had worn my glasses simply because I hadn’t felt like putting in contacts that morning, with my hair in a bun for basically the same reason, and a very average outfit for me which consisted of leggings and a rather basic top. When I walked in my kids were shocked. They hadn’t seen me with my glasses on and demanded I take them off and put them back on several times to be able to tell key differences in my appearance. My favorite comments were:

“Teacher! No glasses, no pretty. Glasses, very pretty!”

Well, thank you Adam!

“Woah, teacher, BIG eyes! Like…plate!”

…Ok, thank you Annabella!

“Face looks smaller.”

I want to say that’s a good thing, so thanks again!

Then, just as I was about to actually feel good about myself before lunchtime on a Wednesday (unheard of, really), another one of my co-teachers comes down the hall and says, “Ah yes, you look much smarter with glasses!”

And, as though I never learn, I said, “I don’t always look smart?!”

To which he and all my students pause, stare at me for a moment and, he responds, “Hm…maybe today you just look smarter!”

…thank you.

What I’m basically trying to say here is, through all of the comments about whether or not I have lost weight, the one time my co-teachers called me out (at lunch) because I had a giant pimple the size of Manhattan on my face, or the one time I tried a new dress and they told me I looked like a grandma, I know that my Korean counterparts only tell me these things out of love and concern. You should know as well, that no matter whether you are teaching or simply coming here for a visit, someone is going to comment on your appearance to you. Take it all in stride and bask in it, because very rarely will you come across this kind of honesty in your life again. Besides, they comment on each other’s appearance just as much so you’re not that special. And remember, nothing they say to you will ever beat the time we were at lunch and one of the MALE Korean teachers asks, “Don’t you think [female Korean teacher] should lose weight?” To which she responded, “Don’t you think [male Korean teacher] should fix that new haircut?” Back home, them’s fighting words. Here, mere observations. And I love it.

 

 

Our first Korean Wedding!

Our beautiful co-teacher standing before all of us with her new husband!:)

So this past weekend we had the great honor of seeing one of our four co-teachers make it down the aisle with her long time boyfriend. It was an absolutely beautiful ceremony where none of us understood what was being said, but got the sentiment all the same. To be completely honest, when she first invited us (and by invited, I mean told us she was getting married so to mark that date on our calendars and attend) I had no idea what it would be like walking in. The first struggle began weeks before the wedding even took place when I realized I had no idea what to wear for such an occasion. The same rules don’t even seem to apply here about not wearing white if you’re not the bride so I was utterly befuddled (my British friend is teaching me to use bigger words in my writing so cheerio, here it is!). We’d also heard that Korean weddings are not like Western weddings in that they are short, sweet and to the point. Coming from other countries where getting married is a celebration expected to take hours upon hours, none of us had ever experienced a “short wedding” (a friend of mine back home had a reception that reportedly lasted 8 hours…). Despite any and all preparations, I still was not even close to prepared for what actually took place.

Weddings in Korea are supposed to take place in the bride’s hometown or where she grew up, so we headed to super south Seoul to a beautiful wedding hall full to the brim with people. Since both the bride and groom work and live in Chungju (about 2 hours south of Seoul), they prepared a bus to shuttle their friends and family back and forth to the big city.  It seemed like as soon as we stepped off the bus everyone else knew exactly what to do, leaving the 4 foreigners caught up in the chaos and insanity that was the waiting area before the wedding even began. Here’s what we now understand about Korean weddings that we did not before:

Weddings here are not like back home where you find a church, outdoor venue or what have you and then rent it out for the day for your wedding and following reception. Instead, brides find one of many wedding halls in the area of their choice, namely where they grew up. They then rent out the hall for ONE HOUR. That’s right, just one hour to get your ceremony over and done with because they send the next group through right after you’re finished. It’s like a drive-thru where you get in, get what you need and promptly get out to make room for the next customer.

When we first arrived everyone was also standing in long lines giving their wedding gifts, but here it’s not about getting toasters, waffle irons or fine china. Wedding gifts here are simply different amounts of money depending on your relationship with the couple getting married. For example, our fellow co-teachers, as co-workers were expected to give about 50,00 won a piece, much less than say family members who were expected to give much more to help the couple start their lives together. This is a very traditional process that I can’t say I disagree with. I mean, I’ll take 100 bucks over a new set of nice plates any day!

Getting serenaded by the wedding singer…in the middle of the ceremony

The money is placed in small envelopes and placed at the table with the couple’s name on them. As foreigners we were apparently not expected to give any money for which I felt slightly bad. In all fairness, no one had told us this was a part of the ceremony so we just tried to blend into the wall while everyone else made it rain. After this we met the Groom who greets everyone out in the reception area before the wedding. He, along with his and the bride’s parents, said hello and acknowledged all manner of friends and family out in the open. This was all a bit strange for me, but what was definitely strange was the fact that the Bride was in another room simply waiting and taking pictures with everyone. If you’ve ever seen a K-drama you know that this is all a very familiar process, but to actually be a part of it was something different altogether. Back home a very select few actually see the bride before she makes her way down the aisle. Here, everyone and their brother can come in to see her and take professional pictures with her minutes before the wedding even takes place. Our co-teacher looked absolutely breathtaking, and we were very excited to see her, of course. Still, I couldn’t believe we were actually seeing her in all her finery.

Standing before everyone to say their vows

We were finally ushered into the wedding hall where we promptly started right on time. First, the mothers of the bride and groom made their way down the aisle, bowed to the crowd and took their seats on the bride and groom’s sides respectively on adorable couches right in front of the altar. Then, the groom, and, finally, the bride with her father. Then it was just the bride and groom at the front of the wedding hall before the pastor launched into the ceremony.

Somewhere in the middle of it all I got called up to sing (this is real life, not a dream) in front of the two of them, during the ceremony. Another Korean singer then sang the bride to tears, though I confess to having no idea what the song was about. They then exchanged pre-printed vows that apparently everyone says (another ‘Wow’ difference)  before hearing the bride’s mother speak. The bride and groom then bowed to both their parents on both sides of the aisle, the groom on his hands and knees and the bride just 90 degrees standing up, to thank them for raising them and handing them over to another to care for them the rest of their lives.

The ceremony concluded not long after that and the bride and groom made their way out of the wedding hall back down the aisle only to have to go back where they had exchanged vows to take more pictures with family and, finally, friends. Hint: that was us.

My favorite part of the whole day was the buffet that served as the ‘reception’ of sorts upstairs from where the wedding took place. This buffet was the absolute truth and was a much needed meal after quite the whirlwind of a day. The bride and groom, now Mr. and Mrs., made a final appearance saying hello and thank you to all who had attended their ceremony. All in all our first Korean wedding was a total success, and I definitely look forward to more!

 

 

                      

 

Why teaching in Korea is the greatest thing I could have done

” Actually, not many people know this, but I tried to come to Korea before I came through EPIK, and when it fell through I was absolutely devastated.”

“You want to…teach. In…South Korea? Why?”

“What on Earth is in South Korea?” 

“What happened to you wanting to be on TV?!”

When I told everyone my decision to move to Korea, I got questions like this all the time. As my 6 month anniversary in Korea rapidly approaches I feel like I am finally allowed to sit back and marvel at the journey I’ve taken. There were lots of reasons why I eventually chose to move halfway across the world to a country I had never been before where I could barely speak the language.

Quite frankly, none of those reasons matter now.

What matters is that I’m here, doing something I literally never thought I would be, fulfilling dreams I didn’t know I had.

In the weeks before graduation when I told my immediate family that I wanted to move to South Korea, to teach of all things, they were more than slightly confused. After all, I was about to graduate with a Television Broadcast degree, and at long last it seemed I’d be starting out on my path to becoming the next Oprah, a dream I’d had since I was a child interviewing my teddy bears (Literally. I was crazy.). Though they were outwardly supportive, I honestly don’t think they took me all that seriously until I was offered an actual reporter position not even two months after graduating. I mentally, physically and emotionally struggled with my decision to take this job for days. I was already in the process of trying to come to Korea, and I knew if I took that job I was never going to make it overseas.

 

In the end I obviously turned the job down, and I have yet to regret that decision even in the turmoil that 
followed. Actually, not many people know this, but I tried to come to Korea through a private Hagwon before I came through EPIK, and when it fell through in August, weeks before I was expecting to step on a plane, I was absolutely devastated. I had turned down a job for this opportunity, put everything on the line only to have my dream forcibly taken from me. When I randomly ran into Greenheart Travel online just after this devastation took place and found out I wouldn’t be able to come to Korea until February, I gave up all that was left of my already dwindling hope. My thoughts were racing with negativity: I had to get paperwork together far too quickly, there was no way I’d be able to scrounge up $1000 in 4 months, and could I stand to go through everything all over again just to be rejected once more…?

Ultimately, I couldn’t tell you what made me finally decide to go through with it, gather the paperwork again and pull myself up by my bootstraps, but I know that from the moment I made the decision to get here I was working my butt off. At one point I was working 3 jobs to save up for both a plane ticket and for when I actually got to the other side of the world. I wasn’t sleeping, I certainly never saw my friends, and my family was starting to worry that I’d gone crazy. Still, I had a goal and a million reasons so I was sticking to it.

When I finally got my placement in late January, I’m not ashamed to admit that I opened that e-mail and cried like a baby. I had been through what felt like Hell and back and what I had wanted for years was finally, finally, real. I had no idea what I was walking into really, but I knew that I had been studying the language and the culture for over 2 years and that I wanted, needed, to make this work because I wanted it more than anything.

6 months later I still acutely remember how stressed I was just over a year ago when my plans first fell through,
along with every bump in the road that came after. While those memories remain, they’re overridden by new ones. Like crazy summer nights on a random beach. That one time I took a crazy 9 hour bus adventure with friends and slept on a stranger’s floor (do NOT tell my mother). I remember (and also only kind of remember…) any and every weekend I’ve spent in Seoul with friends old and new. Instead of thinking back on the tears and frustration I prefer to remember laughing uproariously in noraebangs as we screamed ‘Hey Jude’ into a mic, or when we celebrated absolutely nothing on a Friday night in a bar the one time I had to go in to work the next morning (the results, as you may have guessed, were tragic).

The reason coming to Korea is the greatest thing I could have done isn’t the fact that I overcame so many obstacles, or anything so dramatically ‘Remember the Titans’ worthy as that. Coming to Korea was the greatest thing I could have done because for the first time I did something entirely for me, free falling into an opportunity in which I had no idea what was waiting on the other side. And you know what, I feel like I’m finally making the difference I’ve wanted to make since interviewing those teddy bears at age 5 .

I may not be mic’ed up and ready to give the world’s greatest interview just yet, but walking into the classroom everyday to my students excitedly yelling “TEACHER!” gives me the same feeling as walking onto any stage. Giving out stickers on homework is my new “And YOU get a new car!” equivalent. On very rare bad days when I miss the simplicity of talking into a camera, students will literally half mime-half speak the world’s best broken English and cheer so loud when I understand them I feel more important than any celebrity on the planet.

Basically, my decisions and reasons for coming mean virtually nothing in comparison to what I’m actually accomplishing now that I’m here.If you’re on your way here, whether in a week, a month, a year or 10, your reasons don’t have to be ginormous or profound or spiritual. Your reasons for coming aren’t that big a deal, it’s what what you do while you stay that truly matters, and it took me a long time to see that.

I plan on staying for a while yet, and even though not everyday is perfect, it’s the perfect days that remind me why I fought so hard to get here in the first place. I’m sure I’ll get back onto the path of Oprah eventually. For now, I’ll pretend that moments like the ones where my students tell me how much they learned and how much they hope to achieve have been captured on film, and that’s really enough for me.

“Holy crap, I’m moving to Korea!” FAQ’s (Part 2)

There was obviously no way that I could fit everything about what coming to Korea is like in one blog post, so here is a quick continuation of some of the most frequently asked questions I’ve gotten from people about to take the cross continental move! Some of you will be here as early as next week (Oh ma gerd!!!) so let’s get you started:

6. “Incheon Airport is HUUGGGEEEE…how will I know where to go when I land if everything’s in Korean…?!”

Ok, Incheon Airport is where you’ll get your first real lesson on being in Korea: when in doubt, follow the crowd. Incheon IS in fact one of the biggest airports I’ve ever been in, but once I landed I genuinely just followed the crowd out of the terminal, into the little train that takes you around to the front of the airport, kept following people to customs, through customs, and then out the door to baggage claim. There will also, more than likely, be at least a few foreigners on your flight and I know of people bonding and sticking together from the moment they step on the plane. There are also tons of help desks scattered throughout the airport and nearly everyone I ran into could speak enough English to point me in the right direction. Trust me, if I made it through, YOU can make it too:)

 

7. “What can I expect from EPIK Orientation?”

Sheer, ridiculous, awesomeness. You’re going to be super busy from the time the sun comes up until it goes down, and you’ll meet literally hundreds of awesome people, some of whom will become your best friends from the moment you land in Korea. Wayyyyyyyy back long ago (6 months now…what?!) I documented my entire experience at orientation. Keep in my mind I was still totally jet lagged and was more than likely blogging late at night after a long day on a tablet so realize that, while it may not be the best grammar wise, it should be informational on what you can expect!

 

8. “I’m doing my last minute packing *squeals*! Anything that I can/should throw in last minute that most people don’t think of???”

Besides things from the list I made not too long ago, I would HIGHLY suggest bringing:

• Pictures from home. You’d be amazed what just having a pic of your bff up in your room can do for you after a long day when you just want your friends/family with you.

• Snacks and seasonings! I kick myself everyday of my LIFE for not thinking to bring Old Bay and Season All along. There are some things you’re just not going to be able to find in Korea. Sometimes just the smell of the Old Bay seasoning my mom sent me makes my whole day better

• MOOOOVVVIIIIEEESSSS…I actually almost left my Lion King dvd at home when I left because I thought, ‘I can just download it when I get there’, but I am SO glad I brought a physical copy with me. Again, it was pure nostalgia that made me pack the first and last Harry Potter movies along with a few key others, but after a long day just curling up with one does the trick. I took an old CD case and brought about a dozen movies along with me. It didn’t take up any space at all and it definitely helps!

 

9. “Ok be real with me: how much luggage is TOO MUCH luggage?”

Great question. Actually, I came over with 3 suitcases and a laptop bag. This may sound super excessive, but actually my smallest suitcase and laptop bag counted as carry-ons (which totally worked out) and then the larger two were juuuuuuuust under weight limit. I’d say most people come over with at least 2 or 3 suitcases, even some of the guys and definitely the girls since we have to account for things like hair products and makeup. I would say the only limit is how much you can carry yourself. Going through Incheon everyone else will have their own luggage so it’ll be hard to get help when they’re struggling just as much as you are. Know your limits superhero packers!

 

10. “I can’t believe I’m actually moving to KOREA! Any last minute suggestions before I board that plane?”

Honestly, no! Haha I can blog all day about how great Korea is and how many fun adventures you’ll have when you get here. Until you get here though, you’ll never truly understand what I’m talking about or what I mean. Like any trip abroad this is going to be a whole new experience, and if I can give you any advice it’s this:

•   *Don’t be shy, ask ALLLLLL the questions you need answered. More than likely  at    least a dozen other people have the same question.
•   *Don’t be afraid to try and speak the language. The only way you’ll learn is to be        embarrassing and ridiculous at least once so someone can correct you.
•     When in doubt, smile and nod. Turns out that this is in fact universal!
• Make tons of friends at orientation and after. Everyone was new here once and we all know how it feels to be a little disoriented, even lost.
• Go on any and every adventure possible. Who knows when you’ll get an opportunity like this again?

 

Good luck to all of you travelling this week and in the future! If you have any other questions feel free to shoot an e-mail to daebakdayz@gmail.com before and after your landing!